Hand Wringers Worry of ‘Polarization’

eric strattonThere are those who think Richard Lugar’s primary loss Indiana Treasurer Richard Mourdock is a bad thing. The worriers are Democrats, the traditional media, and some in the Republican establishment. These individuals worry that Lugar’s loss smacks of ‘polarization’ or ‘partisanship’ or the dysfunction of Washington politics.

But why was Lugar’s primary loss really so disheartening to these people?

Because they feel the Congress should offer a non-stop, feel-good, bipartisan parade of legislation passed to protect the earth, help the poor, save the children (except the unborn), care for the elderly, protect the banks, give minorities a leg up, aid and assist Cherokee women, eradicate Christianity from the public square, create or save green energy, jobs, and electric cars, improve education, implement arms control, sustain Head Start, provide free health care, and much, much more while making America safer in every way, reducing our carbon footprint and the federal debt, and enhancing our freedoms.

And if these things aren’t happening—or happening fast enough—it is evidence of the impotence of normal Washington politics, as is the aforementioned primary win—in a rout, the scariest signal to the politicos—of Richard Mourdock.

I must draw upon the words of Dear Reader, so I can be perfectly clear: as I stand here today, we are at a crossroads of history and the real challenge the American people need Washington to address is not more legislation, but rather, how to unwind the unintended consequences of the untenable and unsustainable financial, moral, regulatory, and national security positions that have put into practice by those like Richard Lugar and the rest of the almost-permanent political class.

But where to start in the great unwinding? I’d suggest with appropriations. After all, if it ain’t funded, it ain’t.


About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on May 10, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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