Obama’s vanity leaks

Rich Lowery writes of Obama’s vanity leaks. You know; the national security ones that are capable of causing exceptionally grave damage to America?

Among all the words in the press airing the Obama administration’s secret national-security programs, one sentence stands out. Appearing in the New York Times, it explains why President Barack Obama personally approves drone strikes: “A student of writings on war by Augustine and Thomas Aquinas, he believes that he should take moral responsibility for such actions.”

…The detail reeks of the sycophancy of a White House insider who wants his boss to get credit for all of his prodigious talents and enviable qualities.

So according to the leakers, not only is Obama a great warrior/commander-in-chief, he’s clearly someone who understands national security and the call to morality of ancient Christian thinkers.

While there’s no way to prove or disprove this hypothesis, one thing would help: if Obama were to release his sealed test scores, transcripts, and papers.

And that’s precisely why Obama’s sealed records won’t be released. Chances are Obama has never taken a course on the men or done any writing or personal study on either.

In fact, anonymous sources have suggested that the President believes Augustine is a five-star hotel in Prague and that Thomas Aquinas is a bottled-water company, a couple of items that could make him look foolish in the extreme if off teleprompter.

Which seems more likely: that Obama studies great Christian philosophers in his spare time or that he watches Sports Center?


About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on June 15, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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