Chris Matthews: the rest of the story

(Washington DC, PMNS)

When Chris Matthews made news four years ago by saying that then-Candidate Barack Obama “sent a thrill up my leg,” it turns out his description was a bit in error.

Matthews’s long-time personal attendant and aide, Marianne Foosholler, now promoting her new book, Chris ‘n Me, has offered some clarification.

“While Chris was certainly enamored with Mr. Obama,” Ms.Foosholler said, “the ‘thrill up my leg’ thing was not just an over-the-top metaphor, but it was literally inaccurate.”

“That night, in the MSNBC booth, Chris accidently voided his bladder. Normally his adult Depends would be there to sop up the mess, but we’d been running late and there was no time to get him pampered-up before he went on air. So while Chris did feel something and his leg was affected, it really wasn’t the ‘thrill up my leg’ thing. It was more like a trickle down his leg. He never likes to have any dead air, so Chris was compelled to say something about his physical condition… and he did.”

She added, “While most of America knows Chris for his blather, he should really be known for his bladder.” Later, Ms. Foosholler said that an adult diaper tie-in with Matthews’s strongest MSNBC demographic, nursing home residents who are unable to change the channel, was being examined.

Ms. Foosholler offered the comments on this morning’s Good Day, America. Her book is now available at Amazon for Kindle readers and will be in bookstores Tuesday, November 6th.

(Philup Nubia and Zerxes Jones-Smith from PMNS’s Mumbai Information, Research, and Translation Service enclave contributed to this article.)

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About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on November 1, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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