The left: legalized pot & homosexual marriage; no Big Gulps, cars, or guns

keeperThe left has a phrase it often falls back on. They fall back on it so often they have an ongoing contract with an important national-level printing company that specializes in protest signs, bumper stickers, and t-shirts. The phrase is “keep your laws off my body.”

The fundamental issue of the slogan is one of consent and the desire for governmental non-regulation, that is, personal freedom.

The phrase “keep your laws off my body” is thought to have its origins in the left’s desire for unfettered abortion, but it also has implications for the homosexual community, the use of recreational drugs, and more. However, some have postulated that abortion is bad for the child (and for the mother); that a homosexual lifestyle is less safe and healthy than an otherwise equivalent heterosexual lifestyle; that drugs make people do dangerous and foolish things.

On the other hand the left has no problem—it’s always for your own good—in keeping you from buying a 20 ounce Coke, or a weapon (for self-defense or recreation) or in making life so impossible to drive a car that there’s no practical choice but to opt for “public transportation” (unless you’re a high-ranking state official: then your time is more valuable and it’s state troopers driving your limo, taxpayer-provided helicopters, or even Air Force One).

Seat belts? Click-it-or-ticket (even in states that don’t require motorcyclists to wear helmets; go figure). “Junk food” vending machines in our schools? The left is outraged. One of Michelle Obama’s main goals in life is to impose joyless eating on our children and eventually, everyone else (except for an approved and particular state-approved “elite” which is somehow more equal than others).

And regarding that issue of consent and personal freedom, think about taxes. Whose money is it to begin with?

It could be a while before the left extends their thinking to its logical conclusion: “Keep your laws off my wallet, my car, my gun, my free speech, my religion, my children and family, and my Big Gulp.”

About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on November 12, 2012, in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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