Where is the GOP’s Jay Carney?

Daniel Henninger asks Where is the GOP’s Jay Carney? with the sub-headline saying Republicans need a party spokesman who is smart, articulate, credible and TV-savvy.

Smarting from defeat by Barack Obama’s made-in-Silicon-Valley messaging network, congressional Republicans in Washington are getting tutorials to bring them into a Twitterized world. I have a simpler idea: First join the 20th-century communication revolution by creating an office of chief party spokesman. One for the House and one for the Senate.

I have no problem with Henninger’s proposal, but first note that his sub-headline did not list truthfulness, transparency, honesty, or forthrightness as necessary qualities. Why? Aren’t they needed? (On the whole, these affirmative qualities are absent in Carney. He is instead a professional tap dancer who doesn’t know how to tap dance or perhaps a one-trick pony at what’s normally the only show in town. Henninger’s sub-headline also incorrectly implies that Carney is smart, articulate, and credible.)

While we’re at it, I wonder this: how many times a day does Carney feels the need to wash his hands as a result of his role as the face of the Administration’s propaganda efforts? (Or has he been fully libotomized?)

Henninger might also ask where is the conservative Jon Stewart, Bruce Springsteen, Harvey Weinstein, Oprah Winfrey, Oliver Stone, Michael Moore, Sean Penn, et al. See, liberals in the media and entertainment have a deep bench and an incredible minor league development system. Where do liberals fail in their quest for messaging supremacy? In talk radio and the internet/blogosphere and that’s about it.

Truth and being right will only get you so far as conservatives have sadly learned.


About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on January 17, 2013, in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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