This much is half-true: Dana Milbank, Abe Lincoln, and President Obama

I’m thinking that Dana Milkbag Milbank has a full-blown case of buyer’s remorse as it regards President Obama. But what’s a good mainstream lib like Milbank to do? Easy: he rationalizes his overall pro-Obama stance by adding in (a la Lance Armstrong), “That everyone else is doing it, too.”

Cognitive dissonance is a terrible thing to waste, to paraphrase Rahm Emanuel. So how is cognitive dissonance at work in Milbank?

On one Milbank hand, you have your “Obama isn’t up to the job, either for reasons of intellect, temperament, or both” sentiment:

That messiah [of the 2008 election] never came, and a sluggish economic recovery overshadowed his term. Obama was reelected less because he inspired the nation than because he discredited his opponent. Most Americans still think that the country is headed in the wrong direction, and just one in five trust their government to do the right thing.

On the other hand, you have your Milbank “The other side is doing it too” stance:

Much of this says less about Obama than about the times.

On your third Milbank hand—I blame global warming for his noodelized DNA—you have your Obama hubris issue. Lincoln guided us through a Civil War. Obama guided us through… What?

… the president manages to make his own presidency seem smaller by his frequent invocations of our greatest president.

Back to your second Milbank hand, you’ve still got your “But they’re to blame as well” syndrome:

Today, instead of great moral causes [like winning the Civil War and abolishing slavery], we have ceaseless and petty bickering over paying federal debts.

And that block quote is where it’s obvious Milbank has suffered (best case), cognitive dissonance, or (worst case) a brain injury—or perhaps merely libotomized—perhaps as a result of falling off the liberal fail turnip truck.

The debt is a great moral issue: the Administration is making promises it can’t keep. That’s lying. The Administration favors purposefully incurring debts that can’t be repaid. That’s theft, another great moral cause. They are ever-increasing the power of the government and restricting personal freedom. That’s tyranny, still another issue of great moral gravity. They are practicing crony capitalism to enrich one another. That’s criminal, yet another issue of morality.

Milbank is a media liberal, but I see many cracks in his intellectual armor. And remember this: man is the only creature who can deceive himself. While he may think this much, his column, is true, in this case, he’s only half-right.

… with a thrill in my hand and a Obamacare provided pill on my tongue…

About Professor Mockumental

I enjoy almost all forms of parody, buffoonery, and general high-jinks. Satire has shown itself to be an essential societal need; I therefore humbly offer my services in such a manner. I enjoy mocking the usual suspects at the New York Times (Charles Blows, Moron Dowd, and the earth is flat guy) and Washington Post (Dana Milkbag, E.D. Dijon, and David Ignoramus). There are many others as well, but sadly, there are always too many targets and too little time.

Posted on January 19, 2013, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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